Home for my rants, raves and general sharing of 'insytes'. Some of you will enjoy this gathering of text - others will wonder how I tricked them into giving me a Blogger's license...

Tuesday, July 25, 2006

Turn on the hose - I need to water the money tree out back...

Crap. How did our wedding budget triple in less than a week? Oh I know. I could not find a nice beachy destination spot for our wedding, so Chris and I are now back to looking locally (San Francisco).

Local means big money to get the look and feel we want. Local means no toes in the sand when I say 'I do' as July in San Francisco is just too sketchy. Local means spending way more money than I ever thought we would or could spend on our wedding.



Local means we now have to rip through our guest list to get the party goers down from 125 to around 40 - and this is not an easy thing to do. Have you ever tried to rate your friends? Not fun, and definitely not something I want to have to do again. Talk about a process that could easily drive a person to drink. In fact, I think I need to grab a beer now (yes, at 8am in the morning) just to get through this post.

So back to rating your friends - crap, what a sucky way to spend your evening. Basically it goes like this...
  • You build the 'wish list' guest list - add anyone you would like to share your day with you
  • Count that up, multiply by $200/head and there is your catering bill
  • Pick yourself up off the floor and look at the list closely...must cut some bodies.
  • Who are the people that must be there? (you never ever envisioned getting married w/o them)
  • Place an 'A' next to their name
  • Count the number of 'A's and multiply by $200/head for the revised catering bill
  • Ok, grab another beer and look at the list again. We must cut more.
  • Who would understand the financial thing? Place a 'B' by their name. *
  • Honestly, who are you not as close too anymore? Fine. They get a 'B' too.
  • You look at the list again. You are close. Only talking a few more 'B's and you should be ok. Hmmm...must rethink strategy. Of course, we could opt to go a lot more casual which means our wedding budget can be stretched farther and more people could come - but casual is not what we want for our big day and I am sorry - but we will be a little selfish here.
  • Who did you just meet last week? I know you hit it off instantly and you plan to have them be in your life forever, but we are talking serious dollars here. They get a 'B'. Sorry.
  • Ok, you count again and now have an 'A' list that once calculated against your $200/head budget - you can manage.
Now you can focus back to finding that damn wedding venue...

* The trick though - is not to let your friends know you placed them on a 'A' or a 'B' list, which I stupidly let happen. A friend of mine was over the other day and needed to use the computer for a minute. I had the A/B worksheet open and of course she saw it. And she saw 'B' next to her name. She didn't say anything, but I know it must have smarted to see it. And the sad thing - she is an 'A' in my book. She is someone who I expect to be sipping margaritas with and sharing good stories when we are old and gray. But I had to make sacrifices. And unfortunately, she had to be one of them. Doesn't mean I love her any less... but I should not have allowed that to happen.


** I realize this has turned into a wedding blog. For that, I am truly sorry. I don't really know what this blog was before Chris proposed, but the last thing I ever imagined was for me to spend my time feeling sorry for myself as I spew my emotional drama over the lack of a friggin wedding location. I know I need to snap out of it!

Photo credit: Real Mac

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